A heartwarming, insightful, witty, and amusing memoir about “dadding”

This was my fifty-fifth book I chose via the Reedsy Discovery program, for which I am the single approved reviewer for this new book. I loved the first two in the series, Dear Dory and Dear Arlo, and was contacted by the author to also review this one. This review also appears on Reedsy.

If you’re interested in becoming a Reedsy reviewer (and have the chance to get paid “tips” to review books!) check it out here.

The Premise

Having found solace in penning a “journal” of sorts to his unborn miracle baby via “Dear Dory” and later to his newborn in “Dear Arlo“, the author continues writing a journal to his toddler son. From nursery drama to tantrums to health scares, the journal entries showcase the author’s continuing evolution into parenthood from a father’s (often hilarious and/or immature) perspective.

The Pros

After enjoying “Dear Dory” and “Dear Arlo”, I was excited to once more dive into the raw, honest, and refreshing take on parenthood from a dad’s perspective.

“Daddy” realises that he’s mastered the early challenges of keeping a small human alive; now, suddenly, there are more requirements:

How do I prepare for the next stage of psychological development, one that involves nuances that I simply cannot research?

As he watches his son evolve from helpless infant to a curious toddler with a mind of his own (plus an affinity for bananas, and an obsession with the vacuum — erm, sorry, “Hoover”), he imagines the world through Arlo’s eyes and finds wonder in the small things: the simple activity of wandering off and experiencing a space on his own, the flurry of a first snowfall, the wondrous all-encompassing power of heavy rain that makes the world seem limitless.

On the downside, there are the less-than-ideal moments: the horror of the airborne nappy, the seemingly-senseless tantrum, the exasperating washing-machine vs. toddler battle, and the deeper “Santa-isn’t-real” moments — when a wrong decision can impact the child’s wellbeing, namely an unsuitable nursery; and when parenting communication misfires and the result is a nasty toddler tumble. All of this, of course, while living through a pandemic — and eventually contracting not just the disease, but the debilitating weakness of being trapped indoors under quarantine… with a toddler… ***dun dun dun!***

There are some memorable scene stealers: celebrating the non-parenting moments of freedom to let loose; the anxious early-morning nursery drop-off — followed, of course, by overwhelming guilt; and Mummy (a child carer at one nursery) being devastated to learn that the new nursery’s maximum capacity is five (hers is seventeen). I also liked the through-Arlo’s-eyes “intermission” reports — we all wonder what’s going on in a child’s brain as they encounter the world, and I imagine that many toddler brainwaves are contemplations on how to wreak havoc!

I appreciated that the author doesn’t forget to check his privilege:

It’s times like this when I spare a thought […] for anyone out there who is a single parent with a limited support network to lean on. If they look at the cards they’ve been dealt, they won’t find a too hung-over-to-parent card, a too-ill-to-parent card or even a can-I-have-five-minutes-to-drink-a-cup-of-tea card. I look at my hand, and I’m spoilt for choice at the cards I can lay down.

Overall, from “Dory” to “Arlo” and now to “Toddler Inc.”, a begrudging maturity emerges, evident in reflective passages that ruminate on everything from parenthood to relationships to a “how-the-hell-did-I-even-get-here” career introspection, and this rawness will truly resonate with readers of all kinds. We’re all wondering, to some extent, how point A led to this moment right here right now — what tiny change could have sent our lives down an entirely different path?

From the awful first encounter that eventually blossomed into a loving relationship and a miracle child, “Daddy” reminds us that difficult days are part of the journey. To get to the good stuff — the “serotonin-like substance” that repels negative thoughts and makes you feel alive, you have to power through:

People queue up for the parenthood gig each day because of the unconditional love they have for their children. […] There is nothing more rewarding than parenthood, but you have to work for it.

Conclusion

As a parent of a toddler, this comedic memoir hit home for personally. It being the third book in the series, I can see many readers happily wanting more and more, for the pure escapism of diving into someone else’s mind and learning the inner workings of their family lives. If you love one of these, you’ll love them all — while a parenting memoir seems like it would be a humdrum, I beg to differ; when done right, these words connect to parents everywhere and let us all know that we’re not alone.

Purchase your copy

Other formats:
https://books2read.com/toddler-inc