Review: “Dear Dory”
A uproariously funny reflection of the delirious joy and looming fear of imminent fatherhood
This was my ninth book I chose via the Reedsy Discovery program, for which I am the single approved reviewer for this new book. This review also appears on Reedsy.
If you’re interested in becoming a Reedsy reviewer (and have the chance to get paid “tips” to review books!) check it out here
The Premise
After being told the chances of a natural pregnancy are close to zero, the author is shocked when the pregnancy test comes back positive. He begins writing a journal as if to his unborn child (never mind the profanity!) detailing his emotional rollercoaster journey with his partner, and his day-to-day musings as he contemplates his new identity as a father (among other things). The journal eventually turns into the irreverent, hilarious look at pregnancy from a father’s perspective.
The Pros
Despite my tastes as a reader, as a reviewer, I usually steer clear of anything factual or personal as it’s hard to give a fair shake at what is or was actually someone’s life. Yet the preview of this novel, classed under “Biographies & Memoirs” (a category I also avoid like the plague it often can be), drew me in with its droll, uniquely British humour — and fortunately, I was not disappointed; it kept me thoroughly entertained.
Uproariously funny from beginning to end, “Dear Dory” follows a man’s coming-of-age journey into fatherhood. From the moment the stick turns blue, our Daddy-to-be veers from exuberant joy to panic:
You will be loved unconditionally and parenting you will be our greatest privilege. A challenge, yes, but a privilege — and a joy. But then comes fear. You might have instantly become our most valued possession, but you’re also our most vulnerable one.
Finding solace in journaling his thoughts, the author makes us smile all the way through as he cringes from the hormonal swings of his partner:
Who is this monster, Dory, and what has it done with your Mummy?
…And right on the heels of that, comes a dark shock wave:
I had a dream that Mummy had a miscarriage… I daren’t tell Mummy. I spare a thought for all the other parents out there who don’t get to wake up from the dream, because it’s not a dream, it’s a reality.
The relationship truly gives the novel its identity and a depth that warms the soul. It is evident that they love each other deeply, and though the book is about “Daddy”, we fall in love with “Mummy” as well (particularly when “Daddy” is having one of the moments when she’s reconsidering her choice of partner!)
This was not just about fatherhood, but also a coming-of-age tale into manhood as he considers financial rejigging responsibilities; the challenges of perhaps parenting a special needs child; the changing generational politics of parenting; and identity as a concept that is forever in flux — one may identify as a parent first, but there are so many more roles that still need nurturing to retain one’s sense of self.
Beneath all these ups and downs, he highlights that while mothers go through so much to bring a child into the world, and he has the utmost respect for them (and their carers), still — and this is the message that stays with us:
You have to understand how crazy this whole child-growing business is from a soon-to-be father’s perspective as well.
Conclusion
As a new-ish mother myself, I had a great appreciation for this story that touched on many nuances of pregnancy that felt so familiar. There is a particular craft of a writer to interweave such profundity nestled in the novel’s overarching humour, and I enjoyed the entire journey. I would highly recommend to any adult reader, especially to those who have already experienced the joy and terror of parenting, or who are now beginning their journey. The journey is a long, arduous one, so hats off to anyone who is going through it now!
