May, 2019 - Sacha T. Y. Fortuné

Taking a Break from the Book Baby

I’m barely two weeks back from vacation and my world is still coming back into focus.

And, well… I’m a little ashamed to say that my favourite part of my vacation was the DISTANCE from my books.

Writer burnout is real. Your books consume you.

My book babies have possessed me almost constantly since I first released Book 1 on July 28, 2018.

From there I dived head-first into the downward spiral of a newbie indie self-published writer, and pushed myself to release Book 2 (January 22nd, 2019), shortly followed by Book 3 (March 31st, 2019).

I love writing, I love my books, I love my characters… but all of this took an inevitable toll on my physical and emotional health.

By April (while I was packing for my vacation) in the aftermath of Book 3, I felt like I’d been ripped apart by my characters…

Real-life emotional toll

I guess part of the issue is that I get very, very, very deep with my characters.

It’s real-life romance, baby… and though it’s fiction, it takes a real-life-sized dollop of energy, heart and soul to breathe life into my characters.

I’ve spent so much time living with this story, with these characters, that it’s hard to LET GO. I need to write for other characters, but I’m haunted by the highlights of the characters fully fleshed.

It’s hard to write a sweet scene when I’ve got Darren’s and Luisa’s nasty fight on replay in my head — “YOU THINK YOU ARE SO F**KING LOYAL…” (Book 3)

I’m trying to write something fun for my remaining characters — who SO deserve something fun — but all I can see is Nicole’s dark eyes, her desperation and damage begging — “TOUCH ME, TASTE ME…” (Book 3)

Oh, dear. I’ve made my characters so real for readers — but a little *too* real, for ME!

I needed a break. Thankfully, my vacation — a 3.5-week-long country-hopping cruise/hotel combo — came just in time. And for almost a month, I didn’t do much writer-y stuff. At all.

Writer on vacay (sorta)…

Well, I do need to mention a couple of significant “writer” updates that happened while I was on vacation.

I made a definitive decision to reduce Book 1 of my series.

Before I went off on vacation, I was in two minds about it, as I shared on my blog here. I strongly believe that books shouldn’t be republished and updated constantly, but with some distance, I was able to come to terms with my own feelings of self-doubt and failure as a writer, and I finally decided to take the plunge and cut it down for the greater good.

I worked on it throughout my vacation, and came down to 415 pages (from 555 pages) which is awesome. I’m still hoping to get it under 400 but that would be *really* pushing it, considering how much I’ve already cut. I’ve given myself until the anniversary of Book 1’s launch (July 28th) to produce the slimmer version… so watch this space!

I got an award as a first-time author in my country.

My award from NALIS in recognition of publishing my first novel

In honour of World Book & Copyright Day, Trinidad & Tobago’s National Library and Information System Authority (NALIS) held a celebration for all first-time authors.

It was unfortunate that I missed the ceremony as I was out of the country at the time, but I sent a representative to collect this fabulous little plaque and pin on my behalf (pictured).

There were a few dozen fellow first-time authors altogether, with a range of different types of books under their belts — self-help, medical, and all types of fiction. Any form of creation takes an amazing amount of courage, and I salute all the others who shared this honour with me.

There was once a time I doubted that I would ever publish anything, so I’m thrilled to say it’s great to now be part of my country’s history!

Next Steps…

So, I’ve got the revised slimmer version of Book 1 due soon… and then what?

Well, I still have the pesky Book 4 and Book 5 to complete. The stories are half-assed and all over the place in my head, so I need to seriously sit with myself and get my head back into it.

You see… my book babies did me in. My characters dug their claws in, and hung on tight… for months. I had to let them go, finally, to get to some level of sanity.

And now that I need them to come back, I don’t trust myself (or them) to maintain a safe distance, and at the same time I need them to cross that “safe” barrier so that they can inspire me to write them.

Oh, dear. You’ve ruined me, my darlings. And now what? How do I top that? How do I fall into another character the way you’ve taken me hostage?

It won’t be easy, I know, and I also don’t want to fall into that downward writer spiral again. There is a delicate balance as a writer that you have to tread, so you don’t cross into that danger zone!

I’m happy that I got the break I did, and now at long last I’m ready to take the next step, whatever it may bring.

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Review: “All Your Perfects”

This was my first book by this author, but I can promise it won’t be my last. I went in completely blind, and I was thrilled when it blew me away. There were a lot of moments when I really, really, really wanted to stop reading… but I couldn’t. I read it a few sittings over a long cruise with several consecutive sea days, so I had a lot of dedicated time to focus on the story and really feel it. And feel it, I did… feel it, you must.

The Pros & Cons

Quinn and Graham meet under unusual circumstances, both as victims of cheating, and find themselves together later down the line as fated partners, but their relationship is threatened by the daunting sorrow of infertility. The chapters jump from “Then” and “Now” tracing back the couple’s origin story, and it’s a doozy of a heartwarming rollercoaster that — unfortunately — plummets into the darkest depths of despair in their marriage.

I do love “real-life romance” — hell, I’ve got to love it, because I write it! — but this one was a gut-punch I didn’t expect. The writer accurately captures some of the nuances of marital intimacy, familial relationships and so much more — the tiny moments that can pivot everything, and that are often missed in films, books, and just about any other form of representation.

Thank God for the “origin” moments of levity, because honestly it’s a difficult read if not for those. You love the young couple because they’re simply awesome, and they’re meant to be. Graham is knee-bucklingly adorable in his over-the-top moments, and Quinn is a female character you actually enjoy reading about because she’s not “too much” of anything. She feels real. They are easy to love, and it’s heartbreaking when it flashes to the present-time when they’re both so awful.

Still, you can connect with them even in the bad times, and the story is so intricately woven between the two extremes that you feel like you are there with them. The steamy/sexy scenes — both now and then — are perfectly done (even perfect in its awfulness for the “now” moments), and I always appreciate writing that successfully straddles this fine balance with taste and grace.

My only tiny niggle was the ending. I don’t want to have a huge spoiler, but I think the supposed “solution” they found minimalises all they’ve been through in their journey to this point. It felt like something was added on that just didn’t belong there. It almost, almost, almost made me dock from my rating, but I eventually forgave it and gave the story the full five stars because it stayed with me so vividly as I write this weeks later, and I’m sure it’s not a book I’m likely to forget anytime soon.

Conclusion

Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed this read, particularly the writing style that jerks at your organs at times, the symbolism — “Category 5 hurricane” as a marriage, and the entire journey this book took me on. It was a fresh, tough look at real life that leaves a lasting message about who we are, how we can be better partners to our loved ones, and most importantly the overarching truth in all relationships: you are your own worst enemy.

Purchase your copy

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Review: “Chasing Stars”

This is my second book by this author, and I only wish I’d read it first (as it was written first) rather than going backwards. The more recent one I read — “Easy” — stopped my world to such an extent that I don’t think I can even objectively judge another book by her. But I’ll try! Here goes:

The Pros & Cons

“Chasing Stars” was awesome. I love love love love love how you really feel like you’re in these characters’ heads, feeling every conversation and every doubt and every sorrow. The sentences ramble the way my mind does sometimes, and it’s so refreshing to read something that feels like the way you think. When the scenes get sexy, your entire body twinges and ripples with the character’s.

A couple of my faves:

“I need man smell and man arms and man skin and sweat. I just need someone to hold me together and make me feel like nightmares are just nightmares and I’ll be okay.”

“Oh my God. Ares kissed me. I am so happy my insides are coated in glitter and confetti. But I’m also on the edge of tears because it doesn’t change anything. I can’t have him. He’s not mine.”

Nikki’s friendship with Persephone feels so much like one of mine from my past that it’s scary. The supportive, silent friend bolstering the other who clearly has a much better life; the sacrifices we make as young women; and that seesaw of love/hate that make you wonder how you were ever even friends with this person in the first place… yup. Bang on.

Also, Ares’ male stupidity at times was just awesome. Yes, he was a complete clunkhead, but unfortunately that’s kind of how young guys (or any guys, if we’re being entirely honest) can be at times! Both he and Persephone won your hearts by the end though, never mind the up and downs along the way when you want to knock them down.

I also really appreciated all the adult relationships interwoven into the story — Nikki’s mother is terrifying, but is well balanced with Persephone’s and Ares’ mother who treats Nikki like one of her own and even takes on her younger brother as well. The father characters also bring a nice balance to round out the story, showing that past negativity does not necessarily always need to permeate the present and the future, and there is room for growth and change and maturity from both sides of the generational gap.

Conclusion

There were a couple of moments that I was hoping for a *wee* bit more to push me over the top, but overall this was a stellar read and a fabulous debut novel, and I would recommend to anyone needing something that grabs at your emotions and doesn’t let you go until the end.

Purchase your copy

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